stepping away.

take a step

into the unknown

leave the comfort

and familiarity

behind.

take a few steps

to appreciate

the past

take a few more 

steps

to move on.

take some more 

steps

and leave

the oh-so distant past

take a few more steps

into the unknown

take a step

away from the present

and into 

the future.

take steps.

you know what to do

take them

don't be afraid

just step

one, two, and three

and you will be

in a whole new place

with brand new feelings

and thoughts

and 

dreams.

steps.

p.s: walking away.

conscience

hello A.J. this is your conscience speaking. 

how are you? well, i know i shouldn't be asking you that question but i just want to know. you're fine? good. i have something important to tell and share with you. could you care to listen to me? no, it's not going to take that much time really. this is something important, really important. this is regarding your life.

o.k. i can see that you're quite suffering lately. these past few days has been intense hasn't it? on your emotional status especially. i pity you A.J. why are you torturing yourself like this? what good is going to come out of torturing yourself this way? i know you are still in love with your ex and that you can't really let go but it's time that you take the necessary steps. i know, i know. there are so many things around you that remind you of the past and yeah it is easier said than done, but you know what A.J, you had gone through his before right?

you did. i remembered. you remembered. you went through this before A.J. you will get through this as well. it's time to create a new chapter for yourself A.J. stop looking back at the past now. it's time to look forward. there are other people, your friends, family who will keep you company.

you'd get through this A.J. you will. have faith. be patient. be strong. stop crying. open your heart and eyes and mind. you will get through this.

at the end of the day, you'd learn to smile and walk away. and then, you'd look back at this moment one day and you'd laugh your ass off. the past is the past A.J. no point dragging it into the future. it's time to make new memories. a whole new story, chapters upon chapters, are waiting for you A.J. don't let them wait. take your chances. after all, time is precious A.J. don't waste it on someone who's broken your heart. instead, invest the time on someone who wants to care for it.

i know you still need time but how long A.J? how long? A.J. let me tell you something. we only live once. every single second is precious. every single second gone is never going to come back to you. don't waste your time A.J.

you can do this A.J. learn from the past. look back at what you went through to get this far. now, just take some more steps and you'll go even further. just show that person what that person is missing. c'mon A.J. stop crying. don't torture yourself like this. you will be stronger because of this A.J. 

keep calm A.J, and move on.

yours sincerely,

your conscience.

p.s: thank you conscience. i'll mark your words.

moved.

he entered his darkened room and sat on his bed while he stared out the window. the night was starless and empty, like him. he stared and he stared until he realized a vibration. it was his phone. it blinked and it blinked and it blinked. he scooped the phone up, saw the name on the screen. the phone vibrated in his grip. he swung his arm and threw the phone at a wall. the phone smashed into pieces.

like his heart.

the boy now shifted his gaze to the wall then to his smashed phone on the floor. he can only see little from the light oozing from his lava lamp but he could still see the damaged done. then the boy broke down and cried. he lay on his bed and cried. his hands were covering his face while his body shivered. not because of the cold, no, but because of the emptiness in him. 

when he stopped, he removed his hands from his delicate face and stared at the ceiling. it was empty too. though what was the point staring at the ceiling he cannot comprehend, he knew however that by staring at the ceiling his mind and heart calmed down a little bit. the ceiling was empty too.

like the night sky and his heart.

he smiled and suddenly the tears stopped. he removed his gaze from the ceiling and he stared long at the starless night. he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, opened his eyes and breathed out. he smiled. for the first time in months, he felt that his smile was honest this time, not something forced. for the first time in months, his heart was contend, his thoughts simplified, his soul calm.

then a star appeared.

the boy smiled while looking at it and he mouthed, "thank you," and then he lay on his bed and stared at the ceiling for sometime before he fell into a deep slumber and never to wake up again from it.






p.s: fix me.

when the weather matters.

the weather
the bad weather 
the raining type
is mocking me
insides.


why does the weather
matter?
when the heart is sick
as sick as the weather
when the eyes
are wet as rain
and the heart is as gloomy
as the sky?


why does this weather
matter?
when the heart seems to
bother
that is when the weather 
matters
when the weather
imitates the heart
and the heart
imitates the weather


that is when
the weather matters.




p.s: me.

relationships.

we are all connected in one way or another. be it by date of birth, name, history, future, present, family, friends, foes- we are all connected. these connections, when you think about them, makes life more interesting. the bonds that bind us with other people, it's surprisingly, full of characters. the bonds are either complicated or simple, loyal or full of betrayal, shitty or good etc.

like our characters, our relationships are sometimes based on how we behave, on how we view the world and on how we want things to be. our relationships with people can change, like our characters too. well, actually, depending on our characters. sometimes the relationships change because the person changes or you yourself have changed. 

like people, relationships change too.

relationships either go forward, backwards, or they remain stagnant. some relationships improve, some deteriorate some unchanged. depending on the people too because relationships change when the people decide where they want to take the relationship to.

relationships are not games. relationships are serious. they guide you somehow with your life. it makes your life worthwhile and sometimes relationships can be such an ass. relationships can make you happy, relationships can make you cry, relationships can make you sick, relationships can heal, relationships complicates, relationships simplify.

relationships require sacrifices. relationships sometimes require a change in character. relationships sometimes don't go according to plan. they sometimes go away from the plans. then, the relationships change and so is our lives.

but i guess there are some things that relationships doesn't change that much: feelings, emotions, thoughts. oh well not all relationships you have, some. some. some. some things just don't change. relationships change. but on certain cases, the things in the past, feelings and emotions especially, they don't change.

they remain the same, on certain cases.

and like us, relationships are not perfect. you know why? because we are the relationships and the relationships reflect us-who we are. since our actions, personalities, our life is involved in the relationships, sometimes the relationships define who who we are.

relationships are undefinable. 

i'm rambling. this is just my point of view. it's kinda crappy and i think too much and spend a great deal amount of time thinking about unnecessary things. sigh.

p.s: there you'll be.

the literature lesson

the click-clack of her shoes echoed down the hallway. she walked with such confidence and poise that she may came across as arrogant to people who may not know her. sadly, those people are not wrong on their first judgment of her. her golden hair bounced with easy as her feet stabbed the smooth concrete beneath her. she was about to enter her class. books and papers in her expensive bag and her phone on her hands, she opened the door to the classroom, stepped inside it, and closed the door behind her.

the initial noise and liveliness of the class disappeared, melted away with the heat of the afternoon sun leaving no trace of the presence of sound and fun present in the class before she stepped in. they became silent, stoic, lifeless.

"o.k class!" her soft, shrilly voice echoed through the room and with that strange accent of hers, the students just stared at her in awe. she placed her bags and phone on her desk and stood in front of the class and observed her classroom, her babies. she liked to think of her students that way. babies, children, kids. she liked the idea that she was helping them to grow and prosper into mature, responsible young adults.

"helo students. my name is .... and i'm going to teach you literature. first before we begin with today's lesson, let me ask you. wha' is lit-er-at-chuh?" 

her emphasis on the word literature left bitter taste on some of the students' ears as their face contorted with amazement at her accent. not only that, they were awed by her whole being. the immaculate way of her dressing, the golden hair that falls so neatly on her shoulders, her big, round eyes and her poutty red lips, her tall, slender body made her look more of a model rather than a teacher. she scanned around the room with her big, round eyes hoping for a volunteer but no one dared to raise their hands until the smallest girl slowly lifted her scrawny little arms, stood up and said,

"literature is love,"

"name please, miss."

"lexa, madam."

"thank you lexa. you may sit. tanyone else-t? agreement? disagreement?"

a boy with curly hair raised up his hand and said,

"literature is..." as arthur was about to complete his sentence, an unfamiliar song plagued the room. her eyes grew bigger and she reached for her phone and answered it. she whispered into the phone while arthur stood at his place clueless while the class was in an awkward silence. she finally stopped whispering to her phone and placed the phone back on her table where it belong.

"so you. wha' do you have to say about literature?"

"literature is poems and stories, history,"

"name please, mister."

"arthur, madam."

"thank you arthur. tanyone else-t? the last person, perhaps?" she nodded her head while saying this while scanning the room.

this time, a boy of bright red coloured hair stood up, looked confidently at the teacher in the eye and said

"literature is life, madam."

"good. what is your name?"

"jason, madam."

"you're my favorite jason-t! here, here's a gold-t star for you!" she rummaged through her bag of velvet-skin leather and pulled out a box which inside it lay 10 goldstars.

"jason-t!" she called out, beaming proudly. jason was hesitant at first but then he confidently walked towards her and received a goldstar from her, with a light patting on the head. jason went back to his sit quietly while the classmates stared, mouths agape.

"someone-t said," she began "that there is no wrong or right in literature. well, that only holds true if you have evidence to support your claims."

a little brown colored hair girl jenna raised her hand to ask a question but was ignored by her. she continued on with her, lecture.

"literature is about expressions, thoughts, creativity! but you will not learn all that in MY class. NO." she said this with a sly smile on her face. "you are going to learn literature my way. listen to my ideas, my points and i will guarantee you an A in your tests and quizzes if you remember what i say."

the class fell silent. jenna raised her hand again.

"yes, little girl?" she said, her face contorting softly into slight anger and annoyance.

"does this mean... does this... mean... that our ideas are not accepted if we have a different say about the literature piece?"

"you can try but make sure you have evidence, strong evidence, to support your claim. or else, it t'all will be wasted effort." she said, and smiled, a very deep, meaningful smile at jenna. jenna was glued to her seat, speechless.

"o.k class, today's lesson, we will begin on a poem called..."

the lesson went on that day with little noise and participation from the students. they were quiet. only a few said some things and even those things were shot down by her. the class ended that day with resentment from students. when she glided her way out of the class, the students made their usual noise, but this time, the noises they made were sounds of disappointments and anger.

"how can she teach us literature like this?" one boy said.

"this is unfair! i wanted her to listen to my point of view and she shot me down!" said jenna.

"this is not literature class! she can't be teaching us literature this whole year round! what will we learn? what will we learn?" cried arthur.

"you guys wanna know what i learnt from her today about what literature is?" asked jason to his classmates. they all turned to him and then jason said, "literature is dead and death."

the class grew solemn and quiet and literature has never turned out to be so lifeless.

and their literature lessons continued on with her for the remaining year and the situation, atmosphere, remained unchanged. literature is dead, they say. literature is dead.

p.s: exaggerated truth makes a good story.

a happy ending

there were once a couple, who wanted to live happily ever after with each other but their dreams never did come true. they separated. changed. friends. strangers. they became.

their history were like any other couple who were in love. they loved each other very much. countless of texts, mid-night calls, random calls, sad stories, happy stories, random stories, stories about life, stories about faith, stories about love, fights, arguments- they shared everything together. 

they knew each other; grew comfortable that their actions were predictable to each other. they were entwined with each other so much so that their hearts beat at the same rhythm. they were in love. they were happy, contented, hopeful.

but like some love stories, they ended. just like that.

what happened to be a sweet couple, became no more than just friends. what became of soul mates and companions, became no more than just friends. what became of an important person, became no more than just friends. worse, some became strangers.

so what happened?

life happened. 

they became friends, they acted like friends, they are friends. their hearts no longer beat at the same rhythm. gone are the late-night calls, heart-to-hearts texts, the sharing. gone. 

the things they did, that made them happy, that made them a couple, remained in the past while they are in the present, contemplating the future. one person will definitely move on faster than the other. that sometimes happen. or always happens. depending on your historical context on life. 

but fret not. some couples do get back together in the end but do fret for those who didn't and one person cannot seem to be able to move on. pity. such pity.

sometimes, to reach a happy ending, a fairy-tale ending, a person has to go through major rejections and failures. some didn't have to though, they were the fortunate few. some at the end of the day will find their happy ending. but pity those who gave up so easily.

pity.

be patient, your happy ending may just be on your way.

p.s: it's been a while since i've written a story. maybe i should write some more. maybe, maybe.

character building camp?

character building camp.

pffttt.

what a cover-up! after a minister said those things about your camp and also when the whole world had given their say, now you want to say it's a character building camp? that's not what you said the first time the news came out. i read what you said. it wasn't a character building camp. you said it was a camp for effeminate boys!  

that's why i don't read the newspaper so much anymore. one person says that then the next day it turns out to be something different. and sometimes, what's reported on another newspaper is not the same as what has been reported in the other newspaper. reading even major newspapers feels like reading tabloids sometimes. 

newspapers driven by politics. shouldn't the media be un-biased and not take sides? 

i'm entirely confused with the information being circulated around. it's depressing as well because we don't really know the truth. fiction can be real and reality can be fiction. we may never know for sure!

and i want to stress things out, why are only the effeminate boys given the attention? how about girls who behave, dress, look like boys? it's sexist if women face gender-related problems but what if the males were facing the issue, what would you call it? you'd call the male weak. yes. weak. unworthy of being called a man.

i'm not against feminists but c'mon, you don't have guys calling themselves malenists or something. i think being a feminist brings the level of women down somehow, don't you think? i think feminists are sexists too. can i say that? well, feminist is a politically correct term for sexist females i reckon.

but this is beside the point. the point is,

if it was a character building camp, good! then do it annually, please do so. but to come out the first time stating it as a camp for effeminate boys and within days of that statement, you changed, manipulated the information stating, "oh! it's a character-building camp to make the boys feel bla bla bla bla." 

please! if it were indeed a camp to build character, why were the participants made up of boys ONLY? 66 boys to be exact. why not include the girls? now i can call this being sexist. are you implying here that you do not want the girls to proceed further into life or perform better than the boys? 

i think the media, the government too, or anyone in power, should not sugar-coat things in their reports because what's the point of sugar-coating things if it hides the truth? 

and please, do not contradict yourself because at the end of the day, the only person/entity/side that'll be at the shameful receiving end is yours. just stick to the truth and your stance. if you go against yourself, it'll just make you look more pathetic than you already are.

p.s: confused and disturbed. and thoughtful too.

reality check

this is a reality check. 

i didn't come from a wealthy family. in fact, my family's the total opposite. i guess i look wealthy to some people from the way i carry myself and because i speak english quite fluently. from first impression i may seem to have come from a well-to-do family. the fact of a matter is, i'm not. my family is not wealthy. we're broke. 

i get jealous of my friends who are able to drive around, buy things, eat nice food, whose family can support him/her. my family, they can support me but not as much. i have to work my arse off. the thing is i know where my family stand and i don't ask from them money. i asked from my elder brother some money the other day and he said he hadn't got any to spare and he said he'd give some to me if he had any. until today he hasn't given me a cent. i don't ask from him often. after 3 years of studying, that was the first time i've asked from him money. after that his wife went to update her status by saying

"eh tak malu ke nak mintak-mintak bagai. kalau i malu lah."

i don't know if that status is directed to me or someone else but after reading it my heart was cut. i'm his brother. i deserve a little bit, not much. i don't ask for much, just enough to survive. i don't think i'll be asking for money from him anymore i guess. 

i rarely talk to people about my family because what's the point of talking about my family's negatives right? i just talk to certain few people about them. 2 people actually. i may look happy and smiling and laughing on the outside but in the inside, my mind's thoughts are running wildly and i'm worried constantly. 

studying is the only avenue to help my family. i'm doing it now. but i feel like i'm slipping away. i'm tired. really i am. there are times i feel like giving up but if i do, what's going to happen to my family? so i pull myself back up and i'd move along.

people think i'm thrifty. maybe i am. i am thrifty for a reason. i am thrifty because i am really careful with the way i spend my money. i don't shop. really i don't. the things you see me wear, i own, for the most part, were given to me by someone. i am thankful for that particular person's presence in my life. if it weren't for that someone, i don't think i'd ever own half the things i have now. 

because in reality, i can't afford all those things. or my family can't afford all those things. the amount of money that we have is just enough to live, for food and shelter and bills and other expanses. no extra. 

my future's not secure financially. i'm really scared of the future. who isn't? but the fact that i'm not secured financially scares me even more. who's gonna help me when i wanna start a new life? 

i know while you're reading this you must feel like i'm just being pathetic and whiny but please forgive me, i have been carrying this burden for far too long. i don't really know who i can turn to to help me, to just listen to what i'm feeling and shit. 

i've cried over this before through the phone when i was talking to that someone. i cried. and i cried and i cried because i'm scared of the future. i don't own anything. there's nothing with my name on. if i were to start to build a life for myself and my family, i'd have to start from scratch. 

but i'm thankful. i keep reminding myself that there are other people who are in worse conditions than i am in right now. at least i get to eat once a day (at least) and i don't have to beg for money (not yet anyways) and that i have the chance to pursue my studies. what's life without challenges right? this is mine and i have to face it. there are always ways to overcome things. afterall, God won't give us challenges that we can't handle right? He's fair and He knows what's best for His creations. one day i'll figure out what His plans were for me.

if i feel like life's being unfair to me, i'd just think about the other people who are in harder situations than i am. life is afterall fair. fair to me is balanced. when i'm happy someone's sad, if i'm broke someone's rich, if i'm lucky someone's unlucky, if i'm alive someone's dead. 

see, life is fair because it's balanced not because it is just or equal. things are never equal in my opinion. there are balanced in my point of view. 

so we should all be thankful with what we have. if we want to change, we have to work hard for the change. but first and foremost, we should be thankful and grateful.

i'm sorry if this post is depressing. i just need to let it out of my system before i burst. let me repeat, this is a reality check.

p.s: there are more to things than meet they eyes. 

charmed.

so the rain has stopped

not completely

but almost entirely

the puddles are there

loose, muddy, empty.

the pain is gone

not entirely

but almost completely

the gash is still there

open, vulnerable, raw.

the loneliness

still pangs at times

not really badly

but the silence is there

quiet, unspoken, sensitive.

the tears

they fall occasionally

not often

but they still fall

slowly, unknowingly, painfully.

then there's you

who turns things all around

who's heart is as vulnerable as mine

and then there's me

the one you've been running towards

and without realisation

i'm running towards you too

and we both fall

with our broken hearts

unamended, unhealed

relying on each other

to fix the past

which can never be fixed.

so, 

can the rain stop completely?

can the pain be healed entirely?

can the loneliness leave silently?

can the tears stop falling freely?

have faith,

have faith,

have faith.

both of you.

will be just fine,

as always.

p.s: i'm scared.

shah alam-taiping-ipoh-taiping-sg.petani-shah alam.

i went to taiping on my study week with johan.  well, a part of my study week. stayed there for 4 days and another night in sg.petani, kedah. awesome trip! i wish i could do more of those kinda trips but i'm all drained financially. sigh. money. can't live without you, can i?

it was really a nice trip. meeting boi's family again. the best thing is they remembered me, remembered my name! that made me feel appreciated. the thing i like most is that they make me feel like i'm a part of their family. the mum's so cool! the best part about the trip to taiping was that i get to attend boi's elder sister's wedding. twas a simple one, but lovely indeed, with close friends and family attending the wedding. i became the unofficial photographer. amateur but i guess i got some great shots nonetheless. the food was awesome as well. ate a lot! like seriously a lot! 

oh besides the wedding, i went to a river and had a blast there as well though it was a short trip. my swimming skills are getting a little rusty. i think i should be practicing more. oh before the trip to the river, we went to ipoh just for the sake of watching Scream 4! awesome movie! i can't believe i managed to persuade boi and his mum to drive all the way to ipoh just to watch a freakin movie. but twas awesome as well. they had fun, i had fun. glad they loved the movie. i did as well. johan treated me to a dougnut. darn i'm hungry now.

then, sg. petani for a night at shu's. can't believe i traveled to another state! in one day! went to autocity. fell in love with a bag and a cardigan, RM35 and RM55 respectively. God i wish i had more money to spare! i just wished i could stay at sg.petani a little bit longer. could have traveled to pulau pinang. maybe next time? 

i love trips. they open my eyes and make me appreciate life more. there are definitely more things to see and enjoy and one just have to find the time and resources travel and just enjoy. the thing about the trip was it made me feel like i'm living again. i became a kid. curious about everything and wanting to try every single thing. i guess one more thing about trips is that it makes me miss home and my family. anyways, will be going back soon for 4 months. gonna miss everyone here. darn! i wish i lived closer to them.

i will be stuck in kuching for 4 months. i wonder what i'll be up to?

p.s: travel writer? possibly.

camp for effeminate boys.

I read about a certain state’s decision on having a camp for effeminate boys. I applaud their actions. Applause people applause! Whoever came up with THAT ORIGINAL idea should be given a Nobel Peace Prize. Really they should!

I’m being sarcastic? No! This is me being nice and logical and a tad pessimistic.

66 boys/teenagers whose names were written, recorded down by their teachers and sent to the educational department and then they are FORCED to enter a camp, which idealistically, would change them into MEN in 4 days. Sounds like a fairy-tale to me. If Hans Christen Andersen were alive today he’d have a huge hit and his book about 66 effeminate boys going to a camp that will idealistically change them, teach them how to behave like boys in 4 days will appear on the New York’s best-seller list!

I’ve attended camps. Yes, the ones that’s supposed to make me more patriotic and “love thy country” kinda thing. It did make me feel more patriotic and it did raise my awareness about what a beautiful country I am living in currently, how fair and just the leaders are, how mature they are, how un-biased the media really is- really beautiful country don’t you think so? I’m rambling. It DID change me. For like a week or so. Then I got back being the old me- the one who loves the country for the sake of loving the country, not because of patriotism or anything. Don’t get me wrong. I’d fight for the country I will but the politics here has gotten really crappy that I don’t bother finding out who’s on the right side of the fence anymore. A bunch of old people running a country whose reputation is indeed increasing in the eyes of the world but really, reputation if it’s because of a bad thing isn’t really a good thing for the country is it? They think they know what’s best most of the time but sometimes they really don’t. Oblivious I say!

About the camp, like I said, I applaud their efforts and I can see where they are coming from. They are concerned. These boys could be future leaders, money makers, the ones that’ll make a name for Malaysia in the future hopefully and what they are doing is just to help guide these poor, unfortunate, effeminate souls onto the right path. Pretty idealistic don’t you think?

But poor souls! Having to go through such traumatic experience of going to a camp that’ll make a man out of them is really, really a tiresome thing.

I wonder if the guys who thought about this idea of having this camp studied psychology. Maybe they should send themselves to psychological camps where they will learn about psychology. 

Effeminate behaviour stems from early childhood experience or even because (cringe please) some boys are just born that way (genetics or hormones). Exposure is a critical thing at the early years of growing. This is the stage where the brain absorbs things and our behaviours will become accustomed to the things we are exposed too and this will eventually be brought to adulthood. So parents who (mothers especially) dress their sons in girly clothes, allow them to play girl things and stuff will eventually have an effeminate son. Now I’m being general too here but I cannot help it.

But here’s from experience or the things I have come across or seen: All effeminate guys are effeminate but not all of them are gays. Likewise, all manly guys are manly but not all of them are straight. These are truths and facts. I asked my friends they agree. Even some of the girl friends I have sometimes wonder if the guys they have a crush on or the guys they are dating or just the normal guys they see on a daily basis are straight or not.

I say, send future parents to camps! Teach them the “proper ways” of raising perfect little children! Then the government wouldn’t have to worry about the country being run by effeminate boys or lesbians or children who lack religious knowledge. Then the country would have perfect people who are holistic- flawed not are their characters and are knowledgeable.

A breach of privacy you say? How about sending 66 effeminate boys to camp and being told on how they should live? Isn’t that a breach of privacy too?

I’m not being Lady Gaga for supporting gay movements or what not but this is from pure logic. Correct, this camp will provide them guidance and knowledge and also exposure. But it’s nothing new. These kids got plenty of exposure on how boys should be behaving from homes, schools, television, the internet etc. but why hadn’t they changed?

Because they choose not to.

I’m sure the motivational speakers there would say something like “Go back to the right path. Be a man! Do the right thing.” But let’s face it, if these boys don’t want to change, who are you to force them to change?

This thing called life is a matter of choices and these boys they’ve made a choice for now and they’ve chosen to become effeminate. Some were natural others maybe because of peer pressure while some may see it as a phase or curiosity but just understand that by forcing people to attend camps so that they will change will not make them learn anything. It’ll actually work in reverse.

Maybe some will leave with awareness. For how long though? How long will that awareness stick in them? Will there be more guidance after that? Will the school treat them more properly? Will the teachers not discriminate them? Will the other boys stop bullying them? Will they indeed become manlier after 4 days of camping? How will their parents treat them now? Friends?

I wonder if the guys who thought about this idea thought thoroughly of their actions; the consequences that come with? They thought about the good side no doubt. How about the bad ones? The rise in discrimination perhaps? The social divide? The psychological implications?

Society in general should stop looking down on these people, jeering and what not at them. They need support. A friendly hand guiding them, an advisor, a comrade, a friend; that’s what they need. Not a camp. Really, not a camp. Not bullying, not another form of discrimination disguised as help. They need support.

I know I’m just a guy writing in a blog not agreeing to this idea of having a camp but I would just like to make you realise that what these boys need is not camps. They need help. Guidance. Care. Love. Realisation. Not a camp, really, not a camp. 

So people with power, I challenge you. Instead of doing a camp, why don’t you think of more creative solutions which will have longer impact on the participants involved? I’m sure you people can think of something. After all, you are the ultimate brains of the nation. I have an idea! Why don't we make the camp like some sort of a reality t.v show? the guy who ends up being the least effeminate wins a million RM! that'll be awesome! don't you think? Besides the huge extrinsic motivation to go to the camp, they'll have intrinsic motivation to change. Plus, they'll be local celebrities!

And by the way, if you want to make camps for effeminate boys, why don't you make camps for girls who behave more like boys while you're at it? Killing two birds with one stone as they say. 

P.S: Agree to disagree.