She had his favorite shirt on that day. She didn't plan on wearing it. She just felt like wearing it. Her friends asked her if she's alright when they saw her wearing his shirt. She said she's fine, she just felt like wearing it, she told them. Her friends nodded and smiled sympathetically, and she hated that. Without even asking she told them that she's fine and that there's nothing for them to worry about. The chirpiest of them lot then broke the awkwardness by ushering everyone to class and all of them moved to the class.
It was during lunch break at the library that she snapped. She saw the book that he loved on the shelf and cried reading the notes inside, written by him. She felt every word, recalled every memory those sentences brought up, and when one of her friends saw her crying pathetically sitting on the floor of the library, her back against the bookshelf and her arms wrapping themselves around the book, that's when they knew she was not alright.
You cannot be like this forever, they said. You have to stop acting this way, he wouldn't have liked seeing you behaving this way, they said. How could he see me when he's not even here, she wailed. The librarian had to come over and instructed the friend to bring her out because she was disrupting the other students. She sobbed heavily and she felt weak in the knees. She felt like she couldn't walk anymore. Her breathing became heavy. She was seeing stars. Then, she blacked out.
Then she saw him. She saw him smiling at her, giggling a little. She wanted to cry seeing him and was angry and at the same tie she was laughing too. You told me you'd be alright, he said, you lied, he said, smiling at her. She tried to get near him but she couldn't. Why can't I get closer to you? I miss you. She shouted at him. He just shrugged and said that it wasn't her time yet. I missed you, she said and he seemed to be ignoring her, which upset her even more. You have to start living, he said. I wasn't given the chance to, so you should be happy that you've lived. How could I live when you're not here beside me, she cried. You have to, he said and he began to turn around. No, she screamed. No, no, no! Don't go away, she said. Don't! cried she.
It was a struggle for her to move on. Every night she'd dream the same things. Every day she'd walk around, lifeless. Every moment, she's thinking of him.
One day, they discovered her body lying in a bath-tub, the water colored red. She had slashed her wrist and even her throat. A note was found on her table stating the reason of her suicide. The campus was buzzing with the news of the girl's suicide. People always thought of her as somewhat odd, but they never thought that she'd be brave enough to take her own life. Her body was brought back to her hometown and she was buried there. During the day of the funeral, a lot of people came, including the boy whom she saw in her hallucination. He was observing the solemn ceremony from afar.
He wasn't dead. The reason of her suicide, wasn't dead.
p.s: This is some random shit.
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